There is no Blue State Barbecue . . . at best the meat-eaters among them think Sloppy Joes or Manwiches are barbecue . . . and the rest are latte drinking, brie eating PETA activists.

I am surprised eating barbecue is not a crime in many of the blue states.

Barbecue can be pork or beef, as long as it is pulled meat, spicy, simmered (none of this pouring sauce over a piece of dried-out meat stuff).

It is worth noting that, of the redder states, the best pork barbecue is in the state that voted for Clinton twice (Tennessee), followed by Georgia (for Clinton once) and then NC (always hovering near blue, but not quite there) because of the willingness to put spicy slaw on the barbecue.

Brisket . . . no doubt, Texas. Even us Sooners will give you that one.

Three great, out of the way BBQ joints in the South:

Bozo's, on the state highway between Brownsville, TN, and Jackson, TN. Anctient formica tables and beehive waitresses.

Will's #2, Winder, GA: On the old highway from Winder to Athens, Will's #2 (there is no Will's #1) is a converted family garage with a Dr. Pepper machine and the best pulled pork sandwich in GA. Only open Th-Sat (great for Bulldawg games).

The BP station where I-65 intersects US 231 in Alabama . . . it looms on the western sice of the exit, an international curiosity: a British Petroleum gas station with spicy hot pulled pork BBQ. Even my know-it-all pilto father-in-law concedes this one to me.

I'd invite Bush, because he'd be more likely to bring beer.